Are we faithful?

What has changed in this one month for the tiger? Well, the world knows something that it didn't know last month. And what is it? That the tiger was unfaithful. Isn't that his personal matter and not something that you and I should be commenting at? I don't think our respect for the tiger should enfeeble unless we come to know that he cheated to become the tiger. Thinking laterally, what has he done that none of us has?

If having a crush on someone during high school and loving someone else later is infidelity, I'm sorry, blame 80% of the men. If having loved someone and marrying someone else is infidelity, blame 60% of the women. If having married someone and remarrying someone else when the partner leaves is infidelity, blame social reformists like Raja Ram Mohan Roy. But if you're blaming someone because he did not follow the rule that biased people created for their own benefits, I'm sorry, I beg to differ - all of us have just escaped because there's no rule against similar acts that we otherwise keep doing.

If as a child, you think your love for your parents doesn't reduce after you get married; if as a spouse, you feel your love for your partner doesn't reduce after you become a parent; if as a worshipper, you think God's love doesn't reduce because he gives you failures; as a rational interpreter, I should only think that someone's love doesn't reduce because he loves someone else too. I agree, that might not be the case every time, but if there's anything, it's up to the concerned people to clarify it between themselves and not for anyone outside to evaluate. We should just stop ridiculing and ask ourselves - Are we faithful? If our answer is yes, I think we're mostly lying.

Disclaimer: I am not against the concept of marriage. I don't believe you should love someone more than you love your spouse. I am not saying people should follow whatever their mind says. But according to me, infidelity is to tell someone "I love you" when you actually don't. And nothing else. I am surely not a supporter of adultery, but to me this is like how Sanyasa disapproves Grihasta; it does not mean Grihasta is sinful. Scholars please excuse me for my ignorance. You're welcome to disagree, after all that is what this post is all about - tolerance to different faiths.

Ena Meena Rana

Ena: Have you lifted your self-ban on going for a movie yet? I'm getting bored. I know you prefer to sit and chat for 3 hours than watch a movie, but just checking.
Rana: Yes, you're right. 12 hours every day go in taking care of my own chores, including sleeping. 9 hours go in office working for someone else. Weekends go in catching up. So, I've only 3 hours a day for anything else I would like to do, and fun is the last thing that comes to my mind now.
Ena: Ya, you've even told me there's no time to spend on unstable emotions that don't have any meaning the next day.
Rana: Considering all those 3 hours that I've spilled so far in my life, I think I can't afford to spill them right now.
Ena: I'm sure I was responsible for most of those wasted hours.
Rana: I don't think so, and those're not wasted hours either. You can surely find a use out of anything you do. And breaking monotony is healthy too. Just that I don't need a break right now.
Ena: I think I too don't need one now. Fine, we'll go for a movie some other day then.
Rana: Sure, who else can understand me more than you do? I know life's too short not to enjoy every moment. I'll surely lift all my self-bans some day. Hope you don't take it personally till then.
Ena: Oh no. I know you won't support your people just because they're your people. But I also know that you'll stand by them whatever happens. How can I forget what you told me about reservations.
Rana: Yes, I support reservations because I know that my people oppressed a few others and it's time for the oppressed to win the lawsuit against my people, just as how, for example, AMD won against Intel. "You win, I'm happy. But if you snub me, I'll sue you".
Ena: Yes, I too thought about it. But don't you think someone was oppressed then, and someone else is enjoying now. Where is the justice here?
Rana: When the murderer gets punished, is the victim enjoying the justice?
Ena: We want to warn the rest of the people against such crimes.
Rana: Why do you think it's different in the case of reservations?
Ena: Here the culprit is not punished, but his progeny is.
Rana: The son has to pay his father's debt. He can't just enjoy and then escape.
Ena: But don't you think reservations are being abused? Many of those benefited don't really deserve, and many of those penalized are the ones who actually need.
Rana: That's the unfortunate part. I wish reservations were adaptive enough.
Ena: I would just say my ancestors were intelligent enough to exploit a few others, you can't blame them for using their brains.
Rana: Exactly! Now the exploited are using their brains. Unfortunately, an eye for an eye! Well, the honest answer to your question is "Yes, I hate reservations. But I'm rationally forced to support it after weighing without bias, all I could".
Ena: Let me wait till you're married. You'll then know why all this logic wouldn't matter any longer.
Rana: Yes, that surely scares me. I definitely don't know how I should handle the dilemma of what to care for - my family's mosquito bite or someone else's snake bite.
Ena: If you don't care for your family, who else will? And what can you really do about someone else's snake bite even if you're not in a family?
Rana: I agree with you. I certainly want to care for people for whom I'm the first. But I also want to care for people for whom I'm not the first. I'm not sure what exactly that means, but it pains me to know that there're many who're not the first to anyone.
Ena: Well, if you're more bothered about others, why don't you give all your money to others?
Rana: No, I'm a capitalist, but a social capitalist. I don't want to beg for food, so I'll earn. I won't get a house for free, so I'll own one. I want to lead a dignified life, so I'll buy clothes. I want to live comfortably, so I'll even spend on luxury. No compromises there. All I want to tell myself is I should be useful to this world. I know with all this nonsense I'll end up hurting or at least disappointing people who matter to me, but I can only hope they don't mind.
Ena: Don't worry, even if they mind, they will one day understand what you're saying and realize what you're doing. Not all those with a heart can love, not all those who love can keep expectations low, not all those who keep expectations low can think for others, and not all those who think for others can sacrifice love for the sake of love itself.
Rana: You got it! I want to reach a stage where I'm 100% happy. I think if you're 100% good and can love 100%, you're 100% peaceful. If you keep wondering what good is, you cannot love. And if you can't love, you can't be peaceful. Happiness is always about that inner peace. Unfortunately, I'm right at the bottom still figuring out what 100% good is. Imagine a life with no disappointment, no insecurity, no anger, no selfishness, no bias, no dishonesty, no immaturity.
Ena: Why do you've to live then? That's like being a stone.
Rana: I don't mind being a stone, but I want to be a good stone that treats everyone equally and is peaceful and happy.
Ena: So you agreed you're a stone. Don't you think I've this uncanny knack of making you feel guilty every time? But I know I need to start thinking beyond myself.
Rana: I too need to, and that's needed especially in a relation. You need to ensure that the other person is living a better life with you, than without you. Not the other way around. Allow him to do what he wants to and help him achieve what he wants to. If you can't be a ramp, at least don't be a hurdle. If you can't be a symbiont, at least don't be a parasite. The easier thing to do when you know something is to preach. It's much more difficult to practice. I'm right now doing the easier thing.
Ena: Why am I here for? I'll help you practice what you want to. You've done so much for me.
Rana: Yes, but you be yourself. This world survives not because of people like me, but because of people like you. I can build a house, but only you can make a home out of it, the home that unconditionally loves me and gives me the freedom to do whatever I want to.

And today's fight ended between Emotional Naren who wants to make everyone around him happy, and Rational Naren who thinks he was born for a bigger purpose. But I'm sure something else will come up tomorrow, for them to fight again.